Saturday, April 21, 2012
Yep. This is a FAT girl. :(
I'm so sick of this. So so so so so so SICK of this. Today I wanted to crawl into a hole and hide. Today I went to meet my mom, sister, and nieces at a shoe place and when I got there everyone was looking around at shoes and I joined them. They showed me a few that they really liked and then I began looking around at some myself. My mom came around and started talking to me about the wedding that she went to of her biological sister's family and said how pretty it was and a few details. Then.... she let me know.... I would fit right in.... because the rest of that side of the family was all "bigger" like me...
Bigger... like me.
I tried to laugh it off, but my chest was getting tight and I tried so hard to hold back from loosing it and just crying like a baby. A stupid baby.... that takes this all the time from her. I just wanted to leave. I wanted to get in my car and just leave, but I knew that would have been stupid as well.
All I could think of was to get away from her. I just wanted a moment alone to calm myself down and stop from getting upset..... I couldn't, she kept following me around, everywhere I went. I was like... are you kidding me?!?!
I finally was able to just try and brush it off, I tried so so hard to make the day enjoyable but BELIEVE ME .... those words stayed with me the entire day churning in the pit of my stomach.
I don't need a reminder that I'm Fat mom. I know, I really do. :( :( :(